I found myself in the baby aisle of the book store last night.  I no longer have any interest in the pregnancy books..i have now moved on to books explaining life once the hospital kicks you out…Most books you pick up have very specific agenda's and philosophies they want new parents to buy into.  Anyone or anything that presents a one sided view that there is only 1 right way to do things, and doing them any differently represents failure at the "right way"  just makes me angry.  so, I left a stack of books that i sifted through sitting on the chair…

 Tonight is my first experience with the equivalent of sending your child off to kindergarten- I am letting someone else ride Calvin.  Someone else i don't know very well, and whome i have never seen ride.  Apparently the 12 year old daughter of the barn owner has fallen in love with Calvin and I was asked if she could ride him.  I don't care if other people ride him…I am just having a hard time not worrying about what could go wrong.  He is a pretty decent horse, and has never done anything dangerous.  But you never know what he could get into his head.  Especially since he hasn't been ridden since May.  Sure, i worry about her getting hurt, and how i am going to bring up wearing a helmet when this is one of those barns that NOBODY does it.  Little kids on horses make me nervous.  AND…what if someone else screws him up??  He was being used for lessons by a younger girl last year at this time and she even took him to some shows- but he turned into a nut job and i had to have that stopped.  Either way, tonight, i will take a deep breath and smile…